


Dumbapple Magic, Go!

by reisling



Category: Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Crack, Families of Choice, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, No beta we die like mne, Unreliable Narrator, but it's not that deep, everything is implied, let's spread the end-of-year celebrations spirit, oops my hand slipped
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-08-30 03:57:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16757230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reisling/pseuds/reisling
Summary: Damn it!Sephiroth is sad, so his buds cheer him up.Fill for 2018 FF7 Gaia Santa





	Dumbapple Magic, Go!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [projectHYPOCRISY](https://archiveofourown.org/users/projectHYPOCRISY/gifts).



> When signing up, I said that I'd make one to two pieces of traditional art, plus maybe one digital doodle. And I did all of that. And then my hand kept slipping. And slipping. And now there are almost 2,000 words in addition to all that ~~even though I don't really _do_ the whole creative writing thing~~. Enjoy, I guess?

It was a miserable day, just like any other day really.

The mako reactors were working full-time, regularly pumping mako fumes into the sky. The fumes in turn made the city of Midgar appear as if it was eternally stuck in twilight, just like on any other day.

The only changes were the sinking temperatures as it got closer to the end of the year. The cold did not bother him.

Sephiroth sat down at the desk in his office. There was more paperwork to do, just like on every other day.

* * *

The suit-wearing Dorky Faces expected Genesis to do entire mountains of paperwork, like that was an adequate means of occupying his time. He was a SOLDIER, First Class, not some secretary!

The mere sight of those papers ignited a desire in him to set everything on fire, but Angeal had repeatedly reprimanded him for such behaviour, and made him promise to refrain from doing so (for the foreseeable future). Even if it would help with the heating in this frigid abomination of a tower.

Seeking to distract himself from such gloriously destructive desires while still avoiding his so-called responsibilities, Genesis made his way to Sephiroth’s office. While he cared about compliance to rules and pursuing one’s responsibilities, Sephiroth generally did not give him much trouble for avoiding his, unlike Angeal.

Sephiroth also let him talk about his passions without interrupting, and even remembered all the details afterwards.

Genesis swung the office door open with the declaration: “ _The wandering soul knows no rest_ ”

“Hn. Avoiding your paperwork again?” Sephiroth deadpanned.

Not _much_ trouble. Just one little comment or two, which was many eons better than any one of Angeal’s lectures.

Genesis took a seat on the couch while Sephiroth continued doing paperwork.

“It is this dreary weather. And this abomination of steel called ShinRa HQ is only making everything worse. It makes me wish to let loose some Firagas, if only to glean some warmth. The only consolation is the approaching end of the year, bringing with it the Christmas celebrations.”

“I noticed.”

This was _clearly_ an invitation to elaborate in Seph-speak, so Genesis pulled his legs up to properly lounge on the couch. So much more comfortable than sitting up straight.

“Angeal and I are planning to make a big lunch, including a barbeque if we can get around the smoke detectors. There’ll also be some desserts, like a pavlova with dumbapples and dumbapplesauce.”

Genesis reached into the air and quoted:  
“ _Wings of light and dark spread afar  
She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting_

“Christmas _cannot_ arrive any sooner. What about you? Any plans for the coming days you wish to share?”

“Hn. Not interested. I don’t care for Christmas or New Year.”

In his shock Genesis put his limbs down and fully turned towards Sephiroth.

“ _My friend, the fates are cruel.  
There are no dreams, no honour remains._

“Christmas is the beginning of the best part of the year! First, there are gifts and foods! Then, there are the days where we don’t have to come to work! And finally, a few days later, there are fireworks! Fireworks!”

Sephiroth insisted. “Hn. Still not interested.”

Genesis was rendered speechless. The room was silent but for the scratch of Sephiroth’s pen over paper.

Not for long though, for that was when the door opened. Angeal leaned into the office.

“Hey, Sephiroth. I meant to go check on Genesis, you know how he gets about doing his own paperwork. He wasn’t in his office though, do you kn— oh, there you are. Come on, stop bothering Sephiroth and go do your work already.”

Genesis stood up.

“I wasn’t _bothering_ him. He is _bothering_ me!

“ _Even if the morrow is barren of promises.  
Nothing shall forestall my return._”

With that, Genesis turned and left the room. Sephiroth seemed to be stunned. Angeal apologized for the interruption and quickly followed.

* * *

Angeal walked down the hallway to catch up to Genesis.

“Hey, what was that all about? It was so silent that I almost didn’t notice you, you rarely ever shut up when around Sephiroth.”

“He’s like a stuck-up robot! No emotions at all! Where are the feelings? Does he not yearn? Is there anything he cherishes?” Genesis complained, all too ready to start an entire rant.

“Or maybe it was the Banoran Christmas traditions? Does he strike you as a Midgar city boy who looks down on us folks from the Southern Continent?

“ _My friend, do you fly away now?  
To a world that abhors you and I?_

“How dare he dismiss my thoughts on such festive matters?!”

Angeal tried to reason: “Well, Christmas is generally a family fest. And his only family is a dead mother he doesn’t talk about and Professor Hojo as a father who he avoids. So he might not have the best experiences with Christmas?”

Genesis apparently agreed. “You may well be onto something. I might possibly have misjudged him this time.”

“Well then, you should apologize to restore your honour.”

Genesis rolled his eyes at “honour”.

“… No. Talking is how we got into this mess in the first place. And anyway, aren’t you always preaching to Embrace Your Dreams? To actually _do_ the thing? So that by extension actions speak louder than words?

“ _Even if the morrow is barren of promises  
Nothing shall forestall my return_

“I shall _show_ him how apologetic I am! With the help of Dumbapple Magic, the best comfort to be had on this forsaken planet!

“However, it does need to be a surprise to be truly effective. It has to be kept a secret, so don’t you dare go blabbing to him!”

That did _not_ sound like a good idea. “Genesis, please. It would be much easier to just talk to Sephiroth and get it over and done with.”

But Genesis was determined. “No, I have decided. For the sake our long-standing friendship, I need you to swear on your treasured honour to keep this a secret.”

Angeal sighed while resisting the urge to palm his face. “Okay, fine. But I reserve the right to say ‘I told you so’ when this scheme explodes all over you.”

“It won’t. It’s Dumbapple Magic, after all.

“ _She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting_

“Let’s see, here’s the plan.”

* * *

* * *

In order to rest his eyes as well as his nerves a bit, Sephiroth took a break and went to get some refreshments. While his enhancements apparently gave him a big enough edge over almost everyone else as to be a full ledge, it still felt better to work at a level under his full capacity. It still kept him well ahead of the other people working at Shinra HQ, so he wasn’t actually being lazy and slacking off. Even if Hojo insisted that he wasn’t living to his full potential. Especially since Hojo disdained this behaviour.

After getting his fill of Piroshki and some properly brewed Wutai tea from the break room, he made sure to clean his uniform of any crumbles. They would be highly visible on his black leather duster. It wouldn’t do to be any less than 100% presentable at all times as one of the most prominent faces of this company.

He made his way back to his office, ready to go through another stack of paperwork. In the hallway, he noticed some white light shining through the gap below his office door. He frowned. That was unusual, he always made sure to turn the lights off before leaving.

He cautiously approached. When he arrived in front of the door, he took a breath and fortified his stance.

He slammed his door open, and opened his mouth to question the invader.

It didn’t come to that.

Apparently, he startled the intruder to the point where they threw whatever they had on hand at his head.

“Oh for fuck’s sake! _My friend, the fates are cruel_ ”, came in Genesis’s voice.

Sephiroth opened his eyes and asked: “Genesis? What’s going on? Angeal, you’re here, too? What are you two doing in my office? And what did you just throw at me?”

Angeal and Genesis were frozen staring at him in shock.

Sephiroth took a swipe in the goo on his head, and looked at what stuck to his hand. Unable to identify the mass, he tried smelling it. It was fruity-sweet with a notably spicy note. Next, he licked at his finger. He grimaced and judged it “Very sweet, and very spicy. This burns on the tongue. Maybe some kind of poison?”

Genesis seemed to take offense at that. “ _Some kind of poison?!_ What is wrong with you?! That was a homemade dumbapple pie that I specifically baked for you! _There are no dreams, no honour remains_. I don’t even know why I bothered if this was going to be your reception!”

As he got up and ready to leave in a huff, Angeal stepped in.

“Enough, both of you! Genesis, sit down and take a breath to calm down. Sephiroth, it’s not poison. It was a pie meant as a present to improve your mood.”

“I don’t _need_ to improve my mood, I’m fine, as I’ve always been.” Sephiroth tried to correct.

“Oh come off your chief Chocobo, you’ve been moody the whole day. What is your problem with Christmas exactly, anyway?”

“Nothing, I just don’t feel that strongly about it. It’s not like there is any real point to it.”

“What do you mean, _no point_? Of course there is a point! It’s about beloved people gathering together to celebrate!”

“It’s a thing for children. When I was a child Professor Gast would take the time to indulge me, but I have since grown out of it. We can’t forever remain children. At some point, everyone has to grow up and be an adult. And being an adult means not trying to follow some _childish traditions_ , like some meaningless rituals for Christmas.”

And that seemed to shut Genesis up again.

Sephiroth turned to Angeal instead.

“What did I say _now_ that made him react like that?”

Angeal breathed out and seemed to sag in on himself. “It’s pretty much the entire thing. Especially in regards to your upbringing.”

“I’m well aware that it’s not the standard upbringing most people get.”

“The part about Christmas being an indulgence for children, and how it’s meaningless to an adult. Is this you talking, or are you just repeating what Hojo told you?”

“Hn.

“…

“You mean to say that it’s okay to want to celebrate with food and presents? Even as an adult?”

“Yes.

“I think we all need to sit down for a bit. Just to talk about all the things that might get written off as childish or inappropriate for an adult and a SOLDIER First Class, and sort through them to see which are actually just fine.

“And once we’re done with that we can plan out what to do for this year’s Christmas. All three of us. Together.

“Come on, if we squeeze a bit we’ll all fit on the couch.”

And for once, everything was warm and cosy.

**Author's Note:**

> Epilogue: "Hojo, who?" — Sephiroth
> 
> This is kind of dumb. But then again dudes in their late teens or early twenties generally are. It's not like anyone's gonna seriously try to _stop them_.
> 
> On that note, I am projecting _so many_ of my own issues onto these dumbasses. It's less obvious in a visual medium, but as a written text it gets kind of explicit. What you create is a reflection of your soul...
> 
> @projectHYPOCRISY: Do let me know if/where to you want me to send the physical original, please. Either in a comment here, or [on tumblr](https://rhinefall.tumblr.com/ask). I also have a [twitter](https://www.twitter.com/wreathshade) and a [pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.io/rhinebow).


End file.
